Jim was a former classmate in Grade School (Grades 5 & 6) at Cainta Elementary School. But it was during our reunion (10 years after graduation in 1989) that we saw each other again. It was definitely not “love at first sight” but it was a “whirlwind romance”. He is my first boyfriend. We have a very happy, healthy and normal (by our definition of course) relationship. It was so difficult when he had to migrate to Canada with his family. The pain was unbearable for us but somehow our love bridged the distance. We have proven that love crosses boundaries and that sacrifices do pay off....with a grand prize which in our case “Marriage”.

We’ve been a couple for more than a year when we finally decided (there were talks before about marriage but no definite plans) to get hitched in Year 2001. It was hardly a proposal. It’s not the usual marriage proposal that we see in movies & TVs. You know, the man on his knees and offering the woman a ring (with enormous stone) and asking the million $ question: “Will you marry me?”. Ours was different: We were on the phone (he’s in Canada and I’m here in Cainta) discussing his homecoming in April 2001 when out of the blue he told me he’d marry me next year (2001). Obviously he knows I’d say ‘yes’ if he’d ask. Needless to say I was deliriously happy. The initial plan was December 2001 so that we could prepare especially the financials. But weeks after that initial discussion, the final date became April 28,2001.

So how did I know that #1 I’m ready for marriage & #2 Jim is the right person for me. It was easy. Before Jim came into my life "again" I never felt incomplete and don’t have an urge of looking for a "mate". I was 22 but I was not panicking. I have a degree, stable job, loving family and friends. I’m happy and contented with my life. The truth is I wouldn’t care less if I’d end up an old maid. But he came and showed me that my life would never be truly complete without him. And I’m glad he did and since then I’ve never been happier. Needless to say he swept me off my feet. Initially, I was impressed by his selflessness, sincerity, honesty, wit and passion for books. And as I get to know him better, I was enamored by his patience, respect for me, fidelity, ability to make me laugh, and generosity with his time & emotions. I especially enjoy his poems and short stories ‘coz it’s all about me (LoL!). Each day I learn new things from him and his presence makes me extremely happy. Actually, just a mere thought of him gives me butterflies in my stomach (Aah....don’t loose the butterflies, a lesson from Dawson’s Creek). And in return, he gave me the greatest gift he could offer....his unconditional love. We never felt so blessed for having each other. He even said I’m his answered prayers (Oh geez, I’m close to tears now....) And we’re both glad we waited, after all patience is a virtue.

I barely have 8 months to prepare for the D-day and I made sure I was on top of everything. I enjoyed every minute of it despite the exhaustion. I finally decided, without regrets, to take a permanent Leave of Absence from my MA studies. I was willing to sacrifice that much for him. I even personally handcrafted the invitation (with some help from Jeng, Neil & Yzza…thanks guys!). The souvenirs were ready early February. I made the necessary reservations with endless consultations with Jim. When he came home 2 weeks before the wedding, we were following up on all the details, especially him because he’s so “mabusisi” (critical). At the end of each day, we’d be so exhausted & stressed-out. We even broke a couple of rules (more like “pamahiin”): I fitted my gown 4 days before the wedding and we’ve been seeing each other every single day (even in the morning of our wedding day). You could imagine how extremely harassed we felt all those time. But it was all worth it. We thank our family & friends who have been very supportive and shared our special day. Mr. Joel C. Javiniar (Bro. Joel to all of us) stood as one of our Principal Sponsors. Jeng Gutierrez, Claire Limfueco & Jona Pineda were my bridesmaids.

The wedding ceremony was solemn. Jim was holding my hand during the ceremony which Father Bien noted in his homily (which was interestingly long). We were extremely happy. April 28 was truly special for both of us. Though there were some flaws during the reception, for us it’s the perfect wedding. Not only because I married my best friend, but I married the person I love with all my heart, soul and mind. I know the road ahead in building our family wouldn’t be at all smooth but with us journeying together hand in hand we’ll be able to surpass all the trials that life would bring with God’s grace and continuous guidance. For now, we’re looking forward to a lifetime we’ll be spending together. I can’t wait to grow old with him surrounded by our children, grandchildren and hopefully great grandchildren.

And on that note, let me share what Eduardo Calasanz (an Ateneo alumus) wrote in his article “Partners & Marriage”. Calasanz said that the easy grace of a marriage well made is worth your patience. Furthermore, and I quote: “It is an act of faith and it contains within it the power of transformation.” Positive transformation is a growth by thousand touches of love. In a sense, our love is planted like a seed and in time it begins to flower. We cannot know the flower that will blossom but we can be sure that a bloom will come. Therefore it is something you have to work out on. If you have chosen carefully and wisely, the bloom will be good. If you have chosen poorly or for the wrong reason, the bloom will be flawed. However we see it, it has to be for the right reason/s that we marry. Marriage is something we should not take for granted. It is something sacred and a covenant we make with God (that’s why it is a Sacrament). It is a commitment for a lifetime of laughter, tears, sickness and health until death. If you believe in your heart that you have found someone with whom you are able to grow or if you have the sufficient faith that you can resist the attraction of the road not taken or a partner not chosen, then you may be ready to seek the miracle that marriage offers. If not then wait.

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